A Challenge for Everyone

Hello, friends.

Have you been inside a church? What about a synagogue? A mosque? How about a gurdwara (Sikh house of worship)? I recently had lunch with a friend of mine, and we got onto the subject of Jewish people visiting churches. I remember mentioning to a few young Orthodox Jews last summer that I have been to church, and they appeared shocked. But why?

Temple Adas Israel, Sag Harbor--the oldest synagogue on Long Island

For me, attending church was never a conflict of interest. I pray in a synagogue, I pray in bed, I pray on the street...why can I not pray in a church? Through the years, our family has never been regular attendees of any religious service--we did not go to temple every Friday night, nor church every Sunday morning. But we would go on major holidays, generally to mass on Easter and temple on Yom Kippur. For my part, I would participate in the mass as I felt appropriate: I avoided prayers mentioning Jesus, for example, but happily participated in the more general prayers referring to "G-d." Have you heard of the Our Father prayer? It is a good staple prayer for some Christians, I learned it from a childhood friend who was Christian, and I remember it today and still say it if the occasion arises and I am surrounded by others saying it (at least the first part). Here is a link to the prayer, for those who are not familiar with it: http://www.catholicplanet.com/catholic/our.htm. Saying this prayer--which does not conflict with my conception of Judaism--does not threaten my religious life, but enhances it. I even say prayers written by recent rabbis, they're not necessarily in "official" prayerbooks, but respected men and women wrote them, and I agree with them, so I say them.

 

St. James R.C. Church, Setauket--where we held my grandmother's funeral mass

Now, apparently visiting a church, for the strictest of Jews, is off-limits. Why? For one thing, Judaism prohibits idolatry. Some Jewish people feel that entering a church, some of which have sculptures of Jesus, or saints, would go against this stricture (though most Christians would reject that the imagery in churches is idolatry, I would imagine because they do not consider these symbols actual gods but instead representative imagery). I imagine it would even be offensive to many Christians if they were aware that some Jewish people consider their practice "idolatrous." But I suspect a lot of those who resist do so more out of discomfort rather than religious rules. Instead, some strict Jews (again, remember: I'm speaking about the most conservative; my liberal Jewish friends and relatives find it shocking when I mention that some Jews won't enter a church) might only enter a church for non-religious purposes: to view an important painting, for example, but will not attend during services. Which would mean missing a Christian's friend wedding if it were to take place in a church. But since I'm obsessed with weddings, that clearly will never be an objections you'll hear from me. All joking aside, for me, G-d knows what is in my thoughts and heart; the location of the prayer matters less to me than the meaning of the words I pray. Here's some more information on the Jewish perspective of the topic: http://www.myjewishlearning.com/ask_the_expert/at/ask-the-expert-jews-church.shtml

I guess I had never realized that some people had never been in a church. I could better understand some of my friends from further south, where temples are scarce, never having entered a synagogue. But especially when speaking with people of other faiths, my comfort level in a church and my awareness of Christian religious services can be very helpful. On the other hand, I have only been to Catholic and Jewish services, so perhaps I overreact in my shock at others' lack of experience in various religious settings. I attended services that my family attended (and only Catholic or Jewish weddings by chance as well...so far).*

But I want to. I want to attend a Muslim mosque.** I want to visit a Quaker meeting house. And a gurdwara. And a ton of other religious houses. Because doing so does not shake my commitment to Judaism--my go-to prayer tends to be the Shema (http://www.jewfaq.org/prayer/shema.htm), regardless of the situation or location. But when I meet someone who believes otherwise than I do, if I know at least a little bit about their religious life, I can meet them on a more even, educated playing field. People choose their religions for a reason, and feel strongly about them for a reason, just as I do about Reform Judaism, and I want to understand peoples' passions. It does not have to threaten my beliefs.

So, regardless of your religion, I challenge you to push it as far as you feel you can and attend some type of alternative religious...something. Maybe go to a church if you've never been or head to a nearby synagogue. See if a local mosque or meeting house will allow outsiders to attend services. If you really feel uncomfortable about this, maybe try attending an event held by another group--for example, a social event at a religious location, and listen to how people discuss their faith. Bring along a friend, drag along a sibling, convince your spouse. Make sure to do a quick Google search before you go to make sure you know of any religious differences--if you attend a synagogue, men should put on a yamulke upon entering, for example (liberal congregations often have a box near the door). But give it a shot--even if you mess up, if you go with an open heart, most people will welcome your interest.

Now go out and love one another.

<3,
Allyson

*I have attended Orthodox Jewish synagogues in Italy, and since women sitting behind a barrier (like an actual fence) during services goes against the very core of my being, I guess that was kind of attending a different type of religious service, not something anyone in my family would attend.

**In all fairness, I wanted to attend with a friend in college one month but was told I would not be so well-received by those praying there...perhaps it was just that congregation, or perhaps it was because more generally visitors are not welcomed in mosques, though I would imagine the former.