Just How Sensitive Should We Be?

Hello, friends.

I've been ruminating this week on just how sensitive we should expect Americans to be.

Our country is mainly Christian. Our Founding Fathers were mostly Christian (but still knew enough to establish the separation of "church" and state). So far, our very highest leaders have been Christian. Our country can sometimes feel really Christian.

But growing up it didn't feel that way. Back home on Long Island (at least my parts of the Island), it would have been completely shocking to see something religious in a secular setting, without another religious symbol there, too. For example, Christmas trees are almost always accompanied by menorahs (unless they were in front of specific houses of worship, of course). And anyway, even recognizing Christianity and Judaism does not cover all the bases: we're missing out on recognizing Yalda and the winter solstice and other wintery holidays. But still, I'd rather there be some acknowledgment of other options, not just Christianity.

At the beginning of one semester, coming back from Winter Break, my first day in language class the activity was to talk with a partner about "What we did over Christmas break. What presents we got for Christmas. How we celebrated Christmas." What? Not everyone celebrates Christmas. I was pretty surprised, but I chalked that situation up to the fact that my new professor was from a different country, one where there really are not many Jewish people. But I still made sure that when we presented my partner told the class that "Allyson got a jacket for Hanukkah."

Then this week, sitting in the office of my on-campus job, I noticed a new bulletin board someone had prepared. It has an Easter theme. Complete with a "Finding a Scholarship is like finding an Easter Egg!" and several pastel Easter Eggs with the names of the students who work in the office, including mine (on a bright pink egg). Why? In an office where we try to help find students look for funding for research and study in other countries, on all types of topics, why would we focus on just one religious tradition? It seemed very out of place to bring religion into it, especially at a state school. Now I certainly do not blame whomever did this--I like all of my fellow student workers very much, we're like a little family. I just think sensitivity is important.

Because honestly, every time something like this happens, it's like a little punch in the gut. Another example of feeling like someone is saying, "You don't matter. Anything that is not the majority is not worth noticing." I know it's not intentional, and most of the time the person just does not realize, I know it's not meant to be hurtful, but it is. At least a little bit.

So what do we do? Do we keep everything secular? I think that in a lot of cases, that's better. I understand that stores have religious holiday items mainly for Christian holidays: it makes sense. Capitalism, sell the most product, there are a lot of Christian people, they will spend money on the stuff. That does not offend me. But in normal, secular, non-religious places, I think we might need to strive to be a little more neutral.

This comes up a lot in our household because of the debate a few years back about wishing people a Merry Christmas. It is kind of the same thing...but I do not feel as strongly about that. Why? Probably because of my intense love of Christmas. Strange? Yes. But I love the holiday for secular reasons, for the feelings of goodwill and the smiles I notice on people's faces and being home and snow and New York City being all dressed up like a snow globe. So while I would definitely, definitely prefer that someone say "Happy Holidays!" to me in a store, I do not immediately get offended if I get good wishes for Christmas. At least they're not saying, "Happy Birthday of Christ!" Then I would really be offended...just like how the Easter Eggs in the office make me uncomfortable, but not mad. While I would not say that people should be fired from jobs for wishing people a Merry Christmas, I'd still prefer "Happy Holidays" or something similar around that time of year.

What do you think? Is neutrality best?, since it also acknowledges atheists/non-religious people? Or should we try to cover all the religious celebrations (from Christianity, Judaism, Zoroastrianism, Islam, Sikhism, Jainism....)?

Now go out and love one another.

<3,
Allyson